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Stolen Diaries: Brett Favre

November 15th, 2010

Dear Diary,

Lost another game yesterday.

To the Bears. The freakin’ Bears! They’re horrible.  Jay Cutler doesn’t even have a neck. Just one long chin that makes him look like if Droopy Dog and a tree stump had a baby.

Really getting tired of Coach Childress, too. He won’t let me near any of the athletic trainers anymore.

Since when is it not okay to give them 10” x 12” photos as a thanks for a massage well done?

Sears glossy nudes ARE NOT cheap.

Wrangler called and wants me to keep playin football next year. They said that I can have all the free blue jeans I want. I didn’t have the heart to tell them I only wear pants when I’m shootin their commercials. If they were on my speed dial they’d probably know that. Need to put them on there…

Can’t believe Percy keeps getting out of practice by sayin he’s got “migraines.” Every time my wife asks me about the Verizon bill I get a headache, but I always have to play.

So excited to be playing the Packers next week! I love gorgin cheese, killin deer, and Lambeau leapin into the belly of 400lb. men who are one more McRib from a heart attack.

Kind of like when I used to come home after a big game and shotgun Wild Turkey from a Super Soaker til I got so drunk I fell down the stairs and landed on my Southen Miss bean bags!

Man, I miss the good old days.

Until tomorrow,

Brett Favre

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6 Comments → “Stolen Diaries: Brett Favre”

  1. Anne M Leone 1 year ago   Reply

    Hah! I watched that game yesterday and thoroughly enjoyed Favre’s drubbing! =)

    • Brad White 1 year ago   Reply

      Yeah. His fan club’s not at its peak right now.

  2. annie 1 year ago   Reply

    this kind of thing makes my monday. thanks.

  3. Christy Evers 1 year ago   Reply

    My hubby is a Wisconsinite, born and raised. He lived in Green bay and even had a college job driving Packers around. So . . . Bret Farve is an evil name that shall not be mentioned with good intentions in our household.

    lol! you crack me up!

  4. Brad White 1 year ago   Reply

    Voldemort has nothing on him, eh? Ha! Thanks for the comment.

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