MOVIES. SPORTS. POP. SNARK.
Nashville Snow and Ice Survival Guide Entry 1: The Forecast

If you’re reading this, then you understand the dangers of living in Nashville during the winter months, realize that escape is not an option, and want to ensure you live to see winter 2014. Take your right hand from your mouse (left hand if you lost family members in the Salem Witch Trials), move it overtop your […]

The Only Noises Worse than Christian Bale’s Batman Voice

With The Dark Knight Rises only days away, I thought it appropriate to list the top ten sounds in the world that I find more annoying than Christian Bale’s odd, seemingly Hemorrhoid-induced portrayal of Batman’s angry-time voice. 10. Children laughing. 9. Taylor Swift. 8. The emergency broadcast warning signal. 7. Anything Steve Doocy says, ever, ever. 6. A tracheotomy patient whistling “Let […]

Snow White & the Hunstman: If it will end the pain, I’ll eat the apple.

Snow White and the Hunstman is a tour de force in boredom, poor storytelling, and dwarf poop jokes. Before lighting this termite-infested screenplay on fire, I must give Chris Hemsworth (Thor) credit. This movie is like watching a giraffe pass a buffet lunch from Panda Express. It takes a long time and looks as appealing […]

Rotten Tomatoes is Rotten

Much like Magic Eight Balls and the National Enquirer, I have come to place a heavy weight on the information I receive from Rotten Tomatoes. Since the quality of television is somewhere between Smirnoff Ice and the Iranian space program, I’ve recently found myself Red Boxing like a mad man. And the primary place I  […]